I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
