If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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