I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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