How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize