Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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