just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
