Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
