What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
