I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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