"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
