a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Rumble strips road head = magical
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
