absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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