i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
