Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
