I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize