Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
