is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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