i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize