Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
