we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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