Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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