I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
