Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
