why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
