he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize