oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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