some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize