Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
