People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
