I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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