I bet he comes in French.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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