All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
