So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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