so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
North Korea, Best Korea!
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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