Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
