you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
