$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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