I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
