i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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