sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
