you would pick up someone in the library
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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