Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wish i was in the wii world.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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