You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Drake has all the answers
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
