He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
