It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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