ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
