My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize