I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Just high enough for therapy.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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