Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Randomize
