so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
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