forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
The uberlube is also flammable
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
